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Originally Posted by good times I think most people have some limits/boundries, even experienced swingers. |
REALLLLY!!??
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Originally Posted by good times It has been our experience though, that if a couple has excessive amounts of rules and boundries they usually have issues like jealousy or insecurity in their relationship. Either that or they are just really new, we were like most others here when we first started. |
Seeeeee, experienced people DO think that...
so how do experienced people decide wich it is? Jealousy or new....? My SO has accused me of being jealous, and it REALLLY pisses me off, because I'm not. I KNOW what I do for him! I KNOW we share something that can't be replaced by some sexual fun. I just want to take things at my own pace, if he had it his way, the pace would be a LOT faster
funny but not so funny, because it causes issues sometimes.
As with anything new I'm about to embark on, I like to be informed and make good choices.
We're just realllly new, and I admit, the further we get into this, the more we talk, the more I learn about this lifestyle and other people's opinions/outlook on things, the more secure I feel in letting go of some of the original rules.... like only kissing each other.
I now see it's unfair to place that limit on my SO, (it's caused some discontent between us) however I'm going to reserve the right to refrain unless I'm SO turned on/attracted to someone that I feel I want to kiss them.
As far as other rules:
-We ONLY do this together.
-always condoms with penetration!
-I don't want other men cumming on my face, or anywhere near my crotch (for obvious reasons)
NEITHER of these above will EVER change, period.
Below, these are up for change possibly, in the future.
-No anal w/other men
-no rough stuff from new play partners, maybe down the road once there's some history established...
that's pretty much it
oh and we've agreed not to mix play partners with real life, although again, there are exceptions to this, and it may or may not change depending on who we meet, and how we jive.
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Originally Posted by good times excessive amount of rules created more problems than they prevented. Additionally, we spent so much time worrying about not breaking our rules that it pretty much got in the way of the fun. |
I can see potential for that, which is why I gave up on the kissing thing. Would be off topic to get into explaining this one here... although I'm sure any seasoned poster knows all the reasons people, mainly women give for this rule. I'm sentimental and a lil old fashioned in a few ways, what can I say....
Thanks ALL!
TGIF!!!!!
Dez