Hey all,
Mrs. here! We had a situation this weekend with a couple we know and like, and I'm wondering what is the best way to handle the snag we encountered - tips are welcome!
We like this couple very much - it's mutual. Due to circumstances, we haven't been intimate with them for 6 months, until last night. So we're not new to each other, it's just been awhile. Everything was going great - we all have a real comfort level together. We've all been very much looking forward to getting back together. Lots of anticipation.
Once we got to the room and the play got started, the other Mr. soon lost his erection once he and I got started. He was struggling with it and trying not to show frustration. I asked him what he'd like, and he said me on top. We started that but it just wasn't working out, so I did what any smart woman would - slowing it down a bit, giving oral, going with the flow. Even that wasn't working for him, and he was getting really tense about the erection problem (frustrated, probably embarrassed). Meanwhile, my hubby and the other wife were at full throttle. I
love watching this, and if I wasn't so worried about other Mr. and what I should do, I would have been enjoying the view much more. Suddenly, I was at a loss there as to what to do -- I felt somehow I was supposed to "do something", like it was my responsibility to solve the problem or come up with what to do next, but I was kind of stymied there. I'd already tried what I knew and that hadn't helped.
Fortunately, my husband (he's
really in-tune when it counts - he's
not a bag of hammers) seemed to realize my dilemma at the very moment I didn't know what to do for the other Mr. My hubby took the initiative discreetly to change things around, coming back to me and letting the other Mr. go back to his wife. I was so relieved! I was having fun now, and the other couple was working it out - he suddenly didn't have the problem when back with his wife.
Later, the play continued to switch around different ways, including me giving him oral to completion. That earlier try was the end of it for the evening of him trying to get inside me and maintain an erection. I sense that he is still frustrated and embarrassed by his inability to "complete his mission". Again, I'm wondering if it's my "job" to say something to make it right? We already both wrote nice notes to them about what a great time we had, how awesome they are, etc.
Q: Women, how do
you handle these situations? If what you try doesn't work in helping him get an erection, what then? Men, if you've ever been in this situation as the guy, what do you expect the woman to do - or hope she will do? Everybody -- how much responsibility do I have to try to make things work out for him? How do I know how much to try, or when to quit? Or, should a woman in my position just simply wait for the man to indicate what to do next and not try to
do anything?
Since it worked out just fine for him when he went back to his wife, I'm guessing the reason it wasn't working with me would be nerves, anticipation, performance anxiety, or some other non-physical reason would be the cause of it? He made comments about my husband's endurance, stamina, etc. a few times - could this have anything to do with it?? (It wasn't alcohol and it wasn't really late.) Any wisdom/experiences on this appreciated.
