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Originally Posted by nexteltx But somehow possibly couldn't this be not as bad as it seems, or I think, or you all think... |
You never did say clearly even to us that you want her to stop. I continue to think that it means that you don't want her to stop.
You also aren't really insisting on being there, which I'm taking to mean that you enjoy the idea of her doing something away from you and then hearing about the details later.
MAN can I really really relate to that. When I was about your age my girlfriend and I lived in different zip codes and we had the same thing going on. We gave each other control by mentioning it in advance and asking permission, then we would do things separately, then the minute after it happened we'd write these long, detailed erotic stories and email them and then talk on the phone about it. It was really damned hot and we both enjoyed it. There was a time when only she was getting any and there was a time when only I was getting any, and it was all fun.
We communicated with each other a lot more clearly than the two of you. That's the part that I would suggest changing. Also stop feeling bad for enjoying everything that's happening, it's perfectly natural. There is no reason for you to feel confused about the fact that you're into it. Stop wasting time on that part of what you're feeling.