The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Wife playing alone and I'm not sure I'm ok with it

confunktion · 05-18-2006, 01:37 PM

Where do I start...hmmm...damn, there's a lot that's not quite clicking here. Let's step back, take a breath, and prioritize:

1) Figure out how you really feel about this. I'm really not sure from your post, because I see a lot of hesitancy and indecision. Do you like the fact that she is blowing other guys and wants to take the next step without you, or is this getting out of control and making you feel trampled on by this runaway "sex-on-the-side" train? Take some time for yourself and meditate on it. Once you've got that...

2) Communicate your feelings to your wife. Yeah, you've talked to her already, but it just doesn't seem like the whole message is out there. You two need to sit down and hash this out before anything else happens. I'm not telling you what decision you need to come to or how you are supposed to feel - to each their own - but you need to take a position here and open up a dialogue. You'll be able to more accurately gauge how she is taking things as well, and your next steps will become clear.

I gotta be honest with you, I don't like where this is going at all. One-way ticket to Disasterville. I picture you as a little kid on a basketball court, helpless as your wife scores on you at will. The signs are as bright as a hot-pink miniskirt - I just hope you are able to step back and take an objective look before it gets removed by another guy, without your participation or attendance.

In short, take a stand. Stick up for yourself and your opinions, whatever they turn out to be. I wish you much luck and a huge-ass shot of self-esteem and courage.

Mr. Funk
Bartender, another martini, if you please.

05-18-2006, 01:37 PM	#7 (permalink)
confunktion Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 358 Location: Wisconsin Status: Widower	Re: Major Problem…No One To Talk Too! Where do I start...hmmm...damn, there's a lot that's not quite clicking here. Let's step back, take a breath, and prioritize: 1) Figure out how you really feel about this. I'm really not sure from your post, because I see a lot of hesitancy and indecision. Do you like the fact that she is blowing other guys and wants to take the next step without you, or is this getting out of control and making you feel trampled on by this runaway "sex-on-the-side" train? Take some time for yourself and meditate on it. Once you've got that... 2) Communicate your feelings to your wife. Yeah, you've talked to her already, but it just doesn't seem like the whole message is out there. You two need to sit down and hash this out before anything else happens. I'm not telling you what decision you need to come to or how you are supposed to feel - to each their own - but you need to take a position here and open up a dialogue. You'll be able to more accurately gauge how she is taking things as well, and your next steps will become clear. I gotta be honest with you, I don't like where this is going at all. One-way ticket to Disasterville. I picture you as a little kid on a basketball court, helpless as your wife scores on you at will. The signs are as bright as a hot-pink miniskirt - I just hope you are able to step back and take an objective look before it gets removed by another guy, without your participation or attendance. In short, take a stand. Stick up for yourself and your opinions, whatever they turn out to be. I wish you much luck and a huge-ass shot of self-esteem and courage. Mr. Funk Bartender, another martini, if you please. __________________ The cool points are out the window, and I'm all twisted up in the game...