[sereneiders]

I agree with JnCC here. Even when she meet this guy trough AFF, this guy was upfront with her when telling the importance the lifestyle would have in a relationship for him.

The problem here is that she let grow her expectations even knowing of her own incertanities about engaging in something this guy stated beforehand was critical for him in a relationship.

"I am looking for short guys, but I start meeting a tall one telling him tall guys are fine for me. Once hooked in the relationship I will ask him to chop his legs at the heingt of his knees to have a guy fitting my tastes." It doesn't work this way.

Also, the guy expectations about meeting someone TO be swingers is unrealistic. Swinging is an enhancement to the relationship, one that you have to set aside from time to time, when there are issues that could damage the relationship, so he should face that he MAY end up swinging or he MAY not, and there will be moments where he wont be able to swing, and this shouldn't threat the relationship. From the last post, it seems he's aware of this when not pressing her into this, but anyway, I believe he have motivations to feel pissed and misleaded from the scratch.

If I were this guy, I'd be weaving her good bye and ensure to put a safe distance. If not, from now and on... how to trust on her about many other things I could be being missleaded? As example (may not be the case, just to expose the point), I don't want to have kids at least for a couple of years, she agreed but.... ooops... she get pregnant in the next few months... am I able to believe it happends because of an accident? She may stop taking the pill after missleading me, the same way she did before when I told her I wanted to swing.

A relationship is based on mutual trust, and here it seems trust was spoiled, I cannot figure out a way to recover it. Sorry.