Along with what the others said regarding how hard it is in general to find the right couple where all 4 people click and are attracted to each other, I wanted to add something else.
Oddly enough at most of the swinger parties we have been to, what you described was the norm. It might be the area of the country we lived in. But since most of the other couples fit the same description that wasn't as much of a deal. One thing I always wonder about when it comes to people having a hard time meeting others and they feel it's because of their looks is what sort of vibe that person is putting off.
If someone goes to a party already feeling unattractive they are going to put off that vibe and be less likely to be approached/accepted. The same thing can even happen to a beautiful woman who happens to be wearing a dress she doesn't feel comfortable in. She feels comfortable, and therefore looks uncomfortable and less attractive because of it. Wheras a big guy can go in with a great attitude and just be friendly/flirty with the women around him and somehow those women don't notice those extra pounds he may be carrying (same thing applies to a heavy woman for that matter).
I'm not saying that's the case with you, it's just something I always wonder about when questions like this come up and may be something you might want to give some thought to.
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