Yep as Vegas Lee says..keeping score is a sure way to destroy any chance you have at swinging. If we did that I would be in trouble
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. I have a couple of friends who play with just me, why just me you ask..well one of them has a wife who, like my husband works odd hours and don't have as much free time to play. Another couple is only looking for another woman. We know them all well and have a firm agreement of what is okay and what isn't. Hubby is not the jelouse type and he doesn't feel the need to keep score. We just have great communication and stick to our rules.
So don't panic, things are not as bad as they seem. It is easy to get caught up in the excitement when you are new. Don't be so quick to anger or place blame. Just remember she has never done this before, it is a learning process.