View Single Post
Old 01-26-2006, 04:36 PM   #9 (permalink)
JnCC
Has Left the Building
 
JnCC's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 817
Location: Mulletsville, USA

JnCC hasn't quite let us get to know them yet.
Default Re: married going alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by mywildside
I love the idea of my beautiful wife being with a good looking large, thick lover. When we make love she loves the idea but will go no further. I have decided to try to go it alone.
I understand your frustration, but I think "brickbatting" you over this cheating thing may be a little premature. You might not realize it, but you're actually pretty lucky to be married to a woman who takes things a little slowly at first. Divorce courts are full of people who have done stupid things on impulse.

It sounds like she's open to the idea of including a third. Score one major point in your favor. At least you're both talking about it...and she's smiling.

Have you considered that the problem might be not so much what you're proposing, but how you're going to bridge the gap between "fantasy" and "reality?"

Some people like to dive headlong into new things. Others like to take their time and "ease" their way into them. Your wife may be one of the latter. If that's the case, you might want to consider taking a number of small, baby steps into this. Don't think about how to make this happen right now...think about what you'll need to do to make this happen somewhere down the road. Break it down into the smallest steps you can think of...then break it down some more. I've known one couple who wrote down what they were going to do...and what their limits were. For example...

1) dancing with other men...no slow dancing

2) slow dancing...no fondling

3) fondling...no kissing

You can see where I'm going with this. Take it at her pace...and be there to catch her if she goes a little too far.

I don't see any reason to risk tanking your marriage over this. Not yet, at least. Going from "0" to "full-bop swinger" in one step is a scary proposition for any sane, rational person...especially if it involves a single male.
JnCC is offline   Reply With Quote