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Originally Posted by BradAndJanet What's wrong with saying, "Those are nice shoes"?  I love shoes and the women I know spend considerable time picking them out. I'd think they'd love the complement on their good taste.
Have you considered seeing a therapist? Lots of people do. They can probably assist you in the self-improvment journey you've already started. I'm not real big on pharmacological solutions, but taking one of the SSRI class of drugs for a while might help you overcome some of your fears. Once you gain confidence you probably won't need them and your therapist can wean you off of them.
Just a thought and I wish you the best. 
-B |
Okay, here's the thing. When a high status guy says a woman is beautiful, it doesn't matter what you said because your a high status guy. But when a low status, low confidence guy says it, guess what? You get thrown out pretty fast. You get pegged as the other 700 lovable losers that had approached her in her entire life. Honestly, I get the impression women don't really give a shit who I am until I demonstrate some kind of value to them. Sure they are nice about it (well most of them anyway), but the semantics are what they are.
I find that saying something unexpected and interesting tends to open the conversation better. It has yet to get me a girlfriend or have a one night stand, but I get more positive feedback and conversations tend to last longer. I build some more self-esteem because I can tell they are working to my benefit more. I guess I don't like being rejected, and anything to reduce the odds of being rejected helps me out.
Honestly, the women I should be with (like my genetic compliment) should probably be a lot like me. But they aren't exactly in public approaching strangers like I do, trying to build social skills. LOL. They're probably playing video games or reading or watching star trek.