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Originally Posted by Paradise19 I still don't understand why some men have this double standard - they'll watch their wife with another woman but will refuse to let another man touch her. |
It is not a double standard...
It's called a "comfort zone".
We are definitely not a "good for the goose, good for the gander" couple. For us, we have to be on the same page to move forward. In other words, I am not going to ask her to do something she isn't comfortable with - and I am not going to do something that I am not comfortable with.
If you are only going to play with other women as a way to "coerce" him into a future MFM, then you are doing it for the wrong reasons. Swinging works best when it is something you are both really into - and not a tit for tat sort of arrangement.
My advice is to simply go at the pace of the slowest runner. If you are comfortable and interested in playing within his boundaries, go for it. Allow his boundaries to expand naturally - as he becomes more comfortable. If you are not comfortable with that, then simply back off - wait - talk - find a common place to play, even if that is just the two of you.
Spoomonkey