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Originally Posted by curiousandinter Interesting, so there is some type of relationship that developes with the other couple. However, it stays plutonic...or has there ever been an instance in which a type of jelous bond developes between you and another couple. If not, then what is the difference if they have a personality that you like, because at the very end, you do not want to be attached.
Just asking, because that is the part the keeps me from moving forward with trying this lifestyle. |
I am answering this in theory rather than fact because I am so new to all of this but this is something we have examined and talked about a lot. I don't want to be life long friends with people I play with. So much so that we are wonderful friends with a couple that we both adore and feel sexually attracted to and know that we could easily play if we wanted. This seems to be how a lot of people come into this lifestyle based on what I have read. For me I worry too much that it would damage our friendship in some way and that is too important to me to jeopardize. Now if we played with someone and then formed that type of connection it might be wonderful.....I just don't know. But for me, right now, knowing what I know, which isn't much......I prefer to keep my "real life" and my "play life" separate. But at the same time I can't imagine having sex with someone I didn't feel a connection with beyond sexual. I will use these boards for example......While reading I am 'turned on' by some of the humor I see in Spoons post, I am turned on by the sensitivity and genuine caring that Allura has for his wife. (there are others but these are 2 screen names that jump out at me) There is a cerebral connection even though they could both look like toads for all I know. But I look forward to reading their posts to see what comes next......While at the same time, I read another post that was a bit crude and graphic and it made me hot for about 5 seconds but I couldn't even begin to tell you who wrote it or even what thread....after 5 seconds it was gone from my screen. There wasn't any connection at all. When meeting people in life that for me is the difference. I can't imagine staying hot long enough to have a great encounter with someone if it is just physical.....there has to be something more. I have to enjoy who that person is....not just what they look like.
So that is my opinion from the cheap seat.