[curiousagain]

That is a quandry that all swinging singles find themselves in. Yeah, I really like this girl, but if she's not into swinging, will it work? Well, a marriage that works will with or without swinging. I've dropped some pretty good girlfriends over the years because they were adamantly against the idea of swinging. I personally have decided not to do that anymore. That's a choice everybody has to make. I hope at some point Western Swing comes into this thread because I can't find that link right now but he explained it better than anyone one time.

It's great to have swing partners, and sex with someone new is exciting. Group sex is exciting, etc. etc. etc. But, if you've truly found someone you love wouldn't you give up ONE hobby for them. I've got several hobbies, too many actually, and if I had to give up one for the number one person in my life, it's an effen no brainer here. It's not like they're asking you to give up your children or your pet or you wide screen TV. And, you never know what is down the road. They might decide to swing at some point. And, somebody that swings now might decide to stop. Hell, if we could predict the future wouldn't we all hold winning lottery tickets? I know one couple that the husband tried for 7 years to get his wife to swing before she decided to try it. I know another that it took him about that long and they swung for awhile then she decided she didn't want to do it any more. One rarely knows for sure what the future holds. I think in a relationship you have to be willing to face the future together. I know everybody around here constantly pounds the pulpit of communication, honesty, and trust, but there's a reason for that. If you have those, everything else can be pretty flexible.

The reason I have decided to drop the "willing to swing" checkbox from the list on any future girlfriends is that my checklist has gotten pretty short. It's easier to manage if nothing else. Does she have the same zest for life? Does she enjoy sex? Can we communicate well and trust each other to do as we say we will do and not purposely hurt or use the other one? Is the chemistry there? Do we have fun together? I get those all checked off and the rest of the test is a very liberally graded essay.