The Swingers Board - View Single Post

rugbyjuggalette · 12-08-2005, 12:59 AM

I have several questions, that I haven't seen posted up here before. I have read a lot of the topics, and y'all seem like a cool community, very supportive, so I was hoping to get some honest answers.

I've never done anything that involved more than one person before, but this is something I've been interested in since I was 15 (I'm 24 now), so this is not a fly-by-night fantasy. Its something I've wondered about for years, but am finally acting on.

I joined on on-line group on Yahoo, and I posted that I was new to the group. I instantly was flooded with messages of two things: 1) people who wanted to arrange a party for me and 2) people who want me to invite to a party. I must say, I was surprised by the response.

These are some of my questions: I can I do this as a single female? I obviously don't mean that its hard for me to find people that are willing for me to join, but it's hard to feel comfortable. How do I make sure I'm safe? How do I know that no will mean no? I don't have a husband or boyfriend to watch out for me, so what situations can be okay?

Also, about the guys that want to arrange a party for me-- can they be trusted? Some of them seem like they want to be like a "pimp"-- they'll arrange everything, but only if I definitely sleep with them. It made me feel very weird, and I've gathered from previous posts that I shouldn't deal with anything that makes me uncomfortable. Is this the typical arrangement if you want someone to set something up for you?

Also, I want to be able to share my experiences with people I find attractive. Is this possible? how do I tell people I'm not interested in that I'm not interested?

And one last question-- I've been invited by a guy to a party on Friday night. I think I want to go to see what the whole thing is about. He says that he'll pay for me to go, we'll take separate cars, and I don't have to do anything. He said he planned to just go and watch anyway. Is this something I should do or should I be seeing red flags? Please, I need all the advice I can get!

12-08-2005, 12:59 AM	#1 (permalink)
rugbyjuggalette Registered User Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 2 Location: Outside Chicago Status: Single Female	Advice for New Single Female? I have several questions, that I haven't seen posted up here before. I have read a lot of the topics, and y'all seem like a cool community, very supportive, so I was hoping to get some honest answers. I've never done anything that involved more than one person before, but this is something I've been interested in since I was 15 (I'm 24 now), so this is not a fly-by-night fantasy. Its something I've wondered about for years, but am finally acting on. I joined on on-line group on Yahoo, and I posted that I was new to the group. I instantly was flooded with messages of two things: 1) people who wanted to arrange a party for me and 2) people who want me to invite to a party. I must say, I was surprised by the response. These are some of my questions: I can I do this as a single female? I obviously don't mean that its hard for me to find people that are willing for me to join, but it's hard to feel comfortable. How do I make sure I'm safe? How do I know that no will mean no? I don't have a husband or boyfriend to watch out for me, so what situations can be okay? Also, about the guys that want to arrange a party for me-- can they be trusted? Some of them seem like they want to be like a "pimp"-- they'll arrange everything, but only if I definitely sleep with them. It made me feel very weird, and I've gathered from previous posts that I shouldn't deal with anything that makes me uncomfortable. Is this the typical arrangement if you want someone to set something up for you? Also, I want to be able to share my experiences with people I find attractive. Is this possible? how do I tell people I'm not interested in that I'm not interested? And one last question-- I've been invited by a guy to a party on Friday night. I think I want to go to see what the whole thing is about. He says that he'll pay for me to go, we'll take separate cars, and I don't have to do anything. He said he planned to just go and watch anyway. Is this something I should do or should I be seeing red flags? Please, I need all the advice I can get!