 Re: Not quite solid.
Ah male performance anxiety... they all have it. None of them want to admit it...and somehow... it is the woman’s fault half the time...that I don't get...as I think we have every right to expect a good hard ride. Perhaps that is what scares them…we expect to get something out of it as much as they do… that is counter to how most men were brought up. Women are not passive objects anymore, especially not in the swing community, and they may have difficulty adjusting to just how sexual and voracious we really are.
Regardless, you have to be sympathetic...I think time and comfort level and no alcohol (the main reason for the famous “whiskey dick” or “dairy queen” soft serve condition) are the cure. Once you find regular swing partners, who you both are comfortable with, it will hopefully resolve itself.
If not... then you may want to consider a cock ring. It is an old low tech solution, which may turn off some men... I don't know why... it is really just a sex toy for men that is designed to give the woman pleasure too. It could be fun.
With respect,
~Cat
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