[pacpl4funn]

I absolutly agree with that we are human and mistakes are bound to happen,


from the angle we were in, it was more of a side by side with about 3 or 4 feet of space between us all. I was on the bottom, and hubby was on the bottom, both of our heads were in the same direction.

From what I saw when I heard his voice and the tone of it. is what I described earlier, when I heard his comments and looked over, yes, her mouth was not on his dick, but several inches away, but with the load just hanging, and knowing that he's not a ONE SQUIRTer. LOL Understand what I mean??? Seeing what I seen, I knew there had to be some cum prior to what was hanging off his cock! Which means he came some in her mouth.

In talking to him, His own words, "well I didn't think our rule applied to me since they didn't have the same rule" but in the same breath, he denies cuming at all, with the exception of maybe some "pre-cum" and to be honest, I've never seen pre-cum hang thick like that. it's usually more runny.

His apologies are more sincere NOW, then they were on the night or the day after this happened.

Like I stated earlier, what bothers me the most is that this was a first time experience for both of us and I warned him to becareful. And he wasn't.

I don't like the fact that there was so much separation, distance, and I feel had we experienced a ffm 3sum so I could feel like I was in control and part of him, then I think I might have been ok with the 'cock clean up'

I feel he violated my trust in "over enjoyment" where he knew I needed things to be subdooed (sp) and somewhat restrained for my emotional needs as again, this was new and he knew ahead of time I may not be able to hand it or how my reactions might be,

And he wants to do this again, I just don't know if this is something I can do again if he can't show some restraint. Even if it's to protect my feelings, ya know everybody had a good time, and came, except me! When I saw his cum, that was it, it ruined it for me. His lack of control and care for my feelings took away from my experience and I just don't know how to handle all this. I am trying, but it's horrible at night when I try to sleep next to him and the moment I close my eyes it plays over n over in my head and then I lay there crying into my pillow.

He's never been very good at saying he's sorry and sounding like he means it, must be a macho thing. Right now I need his assurance of love, compassion, etc.... more so that this isn't a "need to have" thing. And on that aspect he IS trying.

When we're older, I want to remember the fun times, not the times he made me cry. That's not so much to ask?

thanks,
pccpl4funn