[joplin]

Chicup, sorry I gave you the impression that I am insecure about the lifestlye or I am paying more attention to what my husband is doing bc believe me, I am giving each man more that a fair chance to get it up. I am about 80% focused on what I am doing to the guy and what is happening between us. The other 20% is just checking on my husband to make sure he is ok, by looks or a touch, something simple like that. The first two situations where about the same where the guys were trying to give me oral, but I'm not much of an oral girl. I would rather give than receive, thats what turns me on the most. The third situation, the man was pretty much limp everywhere. He did attempt to give me oral, however at this point, apparently my husband was hitting all the right spots with the guy's wife and the guy started paying attention to his wife. I was kind of left out for a moment, which is pretty awkward. He then got up to go to the bathroom, which of course gave me the chance to fufill one of my husbands fantasies of a ffm. He was very excited with what I was doing to him along with this other woman, but when the male came back, he basically pulled me back to him and we were back to square one again. I really enjoy what my husband does to these women and it is a great turn on, but what am I supposed to do when he is having a great time, I am turned on by what he is doing, and the male is limp and cant perform? I agree with you that if my partner acted as though they didn't want to be there, it would be a huge turn off for me as well. I just had a hard time after the ffm bc I wanted to continue what we were doing but the other male just wanted me to continue to work on his limp unit, and I was getting pretty tired of that. Believe me, I don't ever want to ruin anything for my husband, we just have a rule that one doesn't play without the other. So if one of us needs to stop, the other stops as well. I think it's great that he is having fun, but I just don't want to constantly be sitting back and having to deal with the limp men. That just doesn't seem right to me. Maybe if the other guy had taken the initiative to just sit out and watch (he later wrote an email saying that he know he wouldn't be able to get it up bc he had had too much to drink but he wanted to keep trying anyway), the experience may have turned out better, but that's the way it goes sometimes. I am just trying to figure out what is happening and if this is a common experience among others.

Thanks everybody for your input on my situation, it is great to hear the different perspectives from everyone so far. You guys have been super helpful for me with this crazy start I have had in the lifestyle. I'm feeling a little better about the situation now that I have heard what others have to say. Thanks so much!