Spoo, that was one of the most entertaining (and enlightening) posts I've ever read here. It's nice to know that if you take the situation in hand (no pun), you're likely to end up embarrassing the doctor moreso than yourself...which can be a lot of fun!
Hey, they're bound by Dr/Patient confidentiality so you're free to say what you like as long as it's not illegal. And they have to sit there and squirm as you say it.
Yeah, I could see how STD screening could make for an interesting date idea.