[curiousagain]

Yeah, it's an individual thing, but I have to echo the comments about the SM is not equal to either partner in the relationship as far as attachment, depth of commitment, etc. Julie made some very good points. If the guy is a little uncomfortable with the male in the room then time alone with the female isn't going to help that very much.

Maybe he just isn't cut out to be a swinger, there definitely needs to be more communication between the SM and the Husband, with or without the wife. I have played with a wife alone at the insistence of the husband and I didn't like it. It felt weird and I won't do it again. Too much like an illicit affair rather than swinging.

But, to each his own, just please try and communicate with each other and make sure everybody is doing what they want to do and not what someone else expects them to do.

Good luck