Hi if you can say the above, you are over it, just don't be set on ever hurting your mate. I lost my first marriage mostly fighting about swinging. I didn't even want to open my mind to what he wanted. I was too insecure as a person and he too demanding, like a father to me. My hubby and I are new and we have been reading this board long before I ever wrote anything about a year. We now have read books on the lifestyle and soon will be visiting our first club and party. One thing that I like about the idea of swinging is I love my husband so much and we gets to experience sex with others, I get to play with the two of them also, mfm and enjoy the other male as well, boy what a way go!!lol facelick We Surrender are together, our marriage is first and that is it!! I love to see him in erotic pleasure, it is hot. This situation can be a tool that you both can use to make a wonderful relationship between the two of you, do you really love him and yourself??? This lifestyle does not have room for malice in your heart, only happiness because of the love and honestity and trust you feel for your darling husband!! Good Luck!!