The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Considering swinging, but have other issues, where do we start?

all4him · 07-26-2005, 09:56 PM

I have to admit, I'm intrigued by the idea, but... i'm afraid it will cause problems between us. Does he want this because I'm not enough for him? I'm a little insecure still in our relationship whcih has been going on for about two years. We've had trust issues in the past mostly having to do with jealousy, and it's been from both sides, his ex, my ex. I'm afraid if another guy is involved and I enjoy it, then he'll think I want to be with somebody else. If it's another woman, will he like what she does better than what I do? And if it's another woman, if I touch her or she touches me (which would definitely fascinate him), does that mean I'm bi? I have no problem with anyone's sexuality, but I have never even thought of other women, nor has the thought of a woman touching me ever turned me on. Can you understand what i'm saying? Then there'sthe fear of my reaction to someone else touching him. I can say it would be ok, but....

He's the only guy I've ever experimented with and most of what he's taught me I have definitely enjoyed. I've become a lot more open about sexuality, his and mine, and don't fear talking about it anymore. I've even gone into a sex shop without (which if you had seen me the first time I went to one, you'd understand what a feat that was). I trust him sexually very much. He's never hurt me, never tried to push the issue if I said no, i don't like that after trying it. And as I said, 99%of the things he's gotten me to try I have enjoyed very much once I relaxed. A year ago we had sex in a public place and I was terrified, now I do things like give him a blow job at the movie theater before they turn out the lights. I just need to find a way to relax enough to try this. And yes, it's for him, he's a freak when it comes to sex, but I'm turning into one, sort of. So it is something I want to try, but how do I start and what advice would you give for a first timer? Should we start with another guy or should we start with a woman? Which do you think would be easier while we go through the adjustment period considering my feelings. And by the way, he thinks it would be very hot to see me with another guy, almost as hot as with a woman. That's the way he put it. Thanks for your advice.

07-26-2005, 09:56 PM	#3 (permalink)
all4him Registered Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 8 Location: las vegas	Re: where to begin???? I have to admit, I'm intrigued by the idea, but... i'm afraid it will cause problems between us. Does he want this because I'm not enough for him? I'm a little insecure still in our relationship whcih has been going on for about two years. We've had trust issues in the past mostly having to do with jealousy, and it's been from both sides, his ex, my ex. I'm afraid if another guy is involved and I enjoy it, then he'll think I want to be with somebody else. If it's another woman, will he like what she does better than what I do? And if it's another woman, if I touch her or she touches me (which would definitely fascinate him), does that mean I'm bi? I have no problem with anyone's sexuality, but I have never even thought of other women, nor has the thought of a woman touching me ever turned me on. Can you understand what i'm saying? Then there'sthe fear of my reaction to someone else touching him. I can say it would be ok, but.... He's the only guy I've ever experimented with and most of what he's taught me I have definitely enjoyed. I've become a lot more open about sexuality, his and mine, and don't fear talking about it anymore. I've even gone into a sex shop without (which if you had seen me the first time I went to one, you'd understand what a feat that was). I trust him sexually very much. He's never hurt me, never tried to push the issue if I said no, i don't like that after trying it. And as I said, 99%of the things he's gotten me to try I have enjoyed very much once I relaxed. A year ago we had sex in a public place and I was terrified, now I do things like give him a blow job at the movie theater before they turn out the lights. I just need to find a way to relax enough to try this. And yes, it's for him, he's a freak when it comes to sex, but I'm turning into one, sort of. So it is something I want to try, but how do I start and what advice would you give for a first timer? Should we start with another guy or should we start with a woman? Which do you think would be easier while we go through the adjustment period considering my feelings. And by the way, he thinks it would be very hot to see me with another guy, almost as hot as with a woman. That's the way he put it. Thanks for your advice.