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twobears · 07-17-2005, 12:04 AM

HI thanks all of the questions you have put into words so much emtional feeling, which is hard for some of us, like me. My hubby and I are new to the lifestyle and even oh I want it for myself I am still working at letting myself learn about me, I never saw myself as a good sexy woman. I have lots of pain and mistreatment from family and ex. I have been married to a wonderful man who over the years with him loving me at my worse, it is still hard for me to accept that he will never leave me and trusting is hard for me. We are reading on the board here and books on swinging. I want to let myself out of that cage, that was very helpful to me, by the way. We have not had many good experiences here in Alaska but we are learning from our mistakes and learning to take our time. I fine that I am more comfortable with a couple if I can have some play with my hubby and the other female. This board has keep me from trying to go pass that comfort zone, my self esteem is not as strong as I would like it to be but I am working on it. This pass year I would not give anything in the world for even with all the crying I have done as I learned about myself ,I still would not change it for anything, the love I see on my husband face is great. It was my idea to try to get into 3some's FMF and now I am able to let myself feel what comes natural to me and that is enjoying seeing my hubby have oral sex with a partner and I giving her pleasure also. I bet you cann't picture yourself doing that.lol My husband and I are so much more open with each other and I do trust him, the feeling left that have to go is just from my poor self image. Anyone got any ideas on how to bet this last, hope it is last, gate I have to go through, self-esteem how can we improve on our own? I will re-read this many times to let it all get into my mind and heart. We have talked we are not sure how we will feel after our first full swap, we enjoy solf swing, and same room very much. I still get nervous oh at the last few moments, I guess I was willing and really for a full swap and the man refused me, he was enjoying watching my hubby give pleasure to his wife, she was really enjoying it.lol My hubby took care of me oh, you will experience all kinds of things. We have decided that if a couple are not comfortable in talking to us about what they want in sexual play then we will not play. Good Luck, and read read read and talk talk talk, boy we were up most of the winter talking late, a good thing to do in winter in Alaska.lol Thanks everyone.

07-17-2005, 12:04 AM	#9 (permalink)
twobears Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 107 Location: Wasilla Alaska Status: couple Swing Lifestyle Name:runningtwobears	Re: Am I ready? HI thanks all of the questions you have put into words so much emtional feeling, which is hard for some of us, like me. My hubby and I are new to the lifestyle and even oh I want it for myself I am still working at letting myself learn about me, I never saw myself as a good sexy woman. I have lots of pain and mistreatment from family and ex. I have been married to a wonderful man who over the years with him loving me at my worse, it is still hard for me to accept that he will never leave me and trusting is hard for me. We are reading on the board here and books on swinging. I want to let myself out of that cage, that was very helpful to me, by the way. We have not had many good experiences here in Alaska but we are learning from our mistakes and learning to take our time. I fine that I am more comfortable with a couple if I can have some play with my hubby and the other female. This board has keep me from trying to go pass that comfort zone, my self esteem is not as strong as I would like it to be but I am working on it. This pass year I would not give anything in the world for even with all the crying I have done as I learned about myself ,I still would not change it for anything, the love I see on my husband face is great. It was my idea to try to get into 3some's FMF and now I am able to let myself feel what comes natural to me and that is enjoying seeing my hubby have oral sex with a partner and I giving her pleasure also. I bet you cann't picture yourself doing that.lol My husband and I are so much more open with each other and I do trust him, the feeling left that have to go is just from my poor self image. Anyone got any ideas on how to bet this last, hope it is last, gate I have to go through, self-esteem how can we improve on our own? I will re-read this many times to let it all get into my mind and heart. We have talked we are not sure how we will feel after our first full swap, we enjoy solf swing, and same room very much. I still get nervous oh at the last few moments, I guess I was willing and really for a full swap and the man refused me, he was enjoying watching my hubby give pleasure to his wife, she was really enjoying it.lol My hubby took care of me oh, you will experience all kinds of things. We have decided that if a couple are not comfortable in talking to us about what they want in sexual play then we will not play. Good Luck, and read read read and talk talk talk, boy we were up most of the winter talking late, a good thing to do in winter in Alaska.lol Thanks everyone.