[Drknow]

You have a very interesting problem that I would like to comment on from the perspective of another non swinger. I am one who has always been fascinated by swinging have have read and participated in a few threads for some time. I am a bit envious of you swingers as I have always fantsized of getting involved myself, but have to say that if my wife came to me and said what yours has said I would have the following reactions. First, I too would be a bit jealous as I would wonder about her motives. From what I have learned of this lifestyle, it is something that a couple pursues together and never is ram roded by one. Things never go beyond the comfort zone of either one and little steps are taken. Like others have said it does sound like she has thought of this for a long time and she obviously has the hots for this guy, but to tell you that she needs to take charge of her own sexual life is to completely violate the unwritten rule that the spouses are to take care of the sexual needs of the partner and if that involves another couple and they are both ready to move in that direction then great. She is wanting to direct her own sexual life and this sounds like a precription for disaster. She needs to become aware of what the swinglifestyle is all about and how it can enhance the marriage relationship. It seems to me that she is wanting to take things in a direction and with a motivation that could lead to dissolution rathen than improvement. Not being one of you guys except in desire, I know I only have part of the picture but I am very impressed by the moral standards of honesty and togetherness that y'all possess. Hope this is helpful.