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Originally Posted by jr555666 Because this was the only way to do so totally anonymously and i had read some other posts and everyone seemed to be genuienly concerned about issues and i knew i would get advice/admonished etc and not get the usual internet ... replies about the sex side of it. I know it was bad that you are all correct about. I'm not looking to get out of anything. I was looking for some thoughts on how to best handle a situation I created by my own terrible acts and go forward. I do thank those of you who took time to write and voice your opinions and I understand that what I did was horribly wrong. |
Wow man, you've got guts. You took the verbal ass-kicking of a lifetime on here.
And yes, I took my shot too. Glad that you understand the magnitude of what you've done. It's the first step. Frankly, I don't know how you'll bring it up to her, but you really do have to do it. I can, however, tell you what to expect. You can likely expect her to think you're joking at first. Then when she realizes you're serious, watch as she pulls her shirt closer over her chest in a protective fashion, run for the bathroom, puke in the toilet (if she makes it that far), and spend about 3 hours in the shower. She was raped. She is NOT going to take that very well. You may or may not get to sleep on the couch - the alternative being the curb. She may very well want to end the relationship. Life is all about choices and living with their consequences. Doesn't seem fair sometimes, but nobody said life had to be fair. If she chooses to forgive you (don't expect this anytime soon - in fact, don't expect it at all), realize that your relationship may change drastically. She will no longer feel safe with you, and you will have to do a lot of suffering and hard work to earn back her trust...and it may never pay off. I'm sorry if I'm painting a grim picture, but it is reality. If you two can work through this, I'd say you'd have yourselves a really rock-solid relationship to show for it.