Still really do not consider ourselves "swinger's" per se, but we have a couple we met through SLS with whom we are very good friends. Our friendship just happens to have an extra-added dynamic!
I wasn't exactly sure how I would feel during or after "things" until, well, during and after.
Last Friday night was our first time to really do much of anything, and we stayed up until like 3 or 4 am laughing, drinking, hanging out, listening to music, with plenty of teasing, making-out, groping, nakedness, and oral sex thrown in for good measure. I told my wife as we talked over the next few days about how it felt for me. I didn't feel like it was me with the other female or her with the other male, but rather my wife and I sharing a sexual experience together. We could watch each other...I loved watching her and seeing things I had so often experienced from a different angle, we could talk, we could look into each other's eyes, and even still touch(some of the time anyway!). During one particularly intimate moment with this four in-line thing(with the girls in the middle of the line facelick ), we were holding hands and I was stroking her hair. Wow! Very intimate, very connected... Being with this other couple enhanced a sexual experience for us as a couple, not for me and for her, but for us. It was as it should be, or the way we think it should be anyway. No jealousy, no insecurities...well, my wife had a couple of the little,"Did she____better than me?" things, but they were easily reassurred. Why should there be insecurities? No one can ever be better than my wife because of the emotional, psychic bond we have and because I love her. And as for jealousy...our bodies and even our minds to a lesser extent might be "on loan" for a brief time, but our hearts belong to each other... So there is my diatribe on emotions! Sorry to get so windy...
Mister half of Utopian Couple