Interestingly enough we've found that most of the limits we've encountered have been far more emotional than physical. Our initial "looking for another couple stage" was an interesting exercise in seeing what other couples felt was a good relationship (and we got to meet some really nice folks), but when we met the couple we're now with things just "clicked". That's not to say each one of us hasn't had episodes of insecurity (or will continue to from time to time...after all this is life), but we all keep the communications channels and our hearts open to each other.
The bottom line is that for us, most of our initial rules seem to have lapsed into unimportance at this point. And the payoff is that a year later things are still getting hotter and hotter, both as couples and all together. So I guess I'd have to say, don't set rules and then forget to question them once in a while...you may find that something you once thought important might be much less of a concern.
Also, lets not forget that many of us set our initial rules at the start of swinging for our protection of our relationships because we didn't know what we'd encounter. Once we became comfortable with what we were doing we found that in most cases it's much more fun to find reasons to do stuff than to defend reasons not to...just our opinion! |