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Originally Posted by mf69_98 Let me bounce this out & see what you all say. My wife has entered into a polyamory relationship with a guy. She has said she'd like me to find a lady to play with when she's off with her lover. So, this basically makes me a married, single guy in that situation. I have her OK & she will play with couples from time to time, but prefers to spend her playtime with her lover for the time being. So....how would people react to this type of situation? I am interested in finding a playmate at some point, but have found it to be very hard to do, for just the stated reasons above. |
I'd say your best bet is, without being too aggressive about it, being upfront about it with potential playmates. If you are comfortable in your lifestyle, it should show. One good strategy to remember is to let them know right away that, yes, your wife has actually encouraged you to do this, as she chooses to do the same. AND that she would be willing to meet with them to vouch for you. THAT's the key, I think. The old story goes "Yes my wife knows, she lets me play alone", "Can we meet her to ensure that this is true, and that she's not being coerced somehow?", "Well, she doesn't like to know who I play with/is too busy to arrange to meet/insert excuse of your choice here". And the couple or playmate goes "Uh-huh, yeah. Right." Do you both play together at times? If that's the case, it might make things easier for you in that you can 'advertise' yourselves as a couple who can either play together or play separately. I think the thing that most people steer away from is the stench of an unhealthy relationship. If your relationship with your wife is close and intimate and healthy, and you can prove it, you should find it less difficult to have some fun.