[bethjane]

Hello everyone,

I am 35 and my husband is 39. We have been married for 15 years, and he is the only sex partner that I have ever had during this time (I had one boyfriend before I met him). We are not swingers and have never discussed anything like swinging. We are pretty conservative and traditional. Over the years we have occasionally talked naughty in bed and have watched a couple of x-rated movies when we were on holiday. But the idea of including another sex partner is something that neither of us have ever brought up.

So here is the thing. I love my husband more than anything and we still have good sex. However, for the last couple of years I have become more and more curious about what it would be like to experience another male sex partner. I would never cheat on my husband and I have no interest in being alone with another man. I love my husband and I want us to be together for the rest of our lives. I guess what I fantasize about is the idea of experiencing intercourse with another male and my husband together, with my husband completely involved and sharing the entire experience with me. I masturbate a lot to this thought.

I always assumed that this is something that would have to remain a secret fantasy until I started reading all the posts of couples who are in love but have included another male sexually in their bed, and of husbands who fantasize about this scenario. My husband has never mentioned anything like this to me, and I wonder if he has ever thought about it. How do you even bring up such a topic after a 15 year monogomous relationship? I would appreciate any advice on how I could subtlely bring up the idea of another male in our bed without ruining our relationship or undermining his masculinity at the same time. The thought of my husband agreeing to this is really exciting to me, but it is nothing to ruin our marriage over. How can I bring it up and at the same time have a way out if he reacts bad? I don't want to hurt him in anyway.