The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Frustrated and feel our looks are keeping us from finding playmates

playfulnreno · 03-14-2005, 05:18 PM

Without making this a book......LOL - we are fairly new to the swinging lifestyle about 1 year and have had some wonderful experiences and are REALLY wanting many more BUT we seem to have a small problem. We are a couple in our mid 40's - she is on the plump side, beautiful face (REALLY!) great personality and I'm well less than average, hefty side, balding and just not all that to look at BUT I have a great personality as well and really know what women like (HOW THE HELL DO YOU THINK I GOT HER! LOL). Anyway - we are having a very difficult time with hooking up with other couples because of our looks. The couples we find attractive are not interested because we are not the "beautiful" people, you know great bodies, beautiful faces, etc. and the ones who are interested are just not attractive to us. It has gotten to the point of becoming very frustrated. She feels it is her fault because she is on the plump side and this is really killing her self esteem not to mention it is hurting mine to. Usually people have a problem with the actual swinging LOL we are fine there - it is the frustration we have when nothing happens that is killing us. I am not looking for answers just words of encouragement, etc.

We understand the physical attraction we have that as well - but we also believe in getting to know people as well before we say no. We have had several couples who have meet us at clubs end up going off with others we have introduced them to only to exclude us. Would just like to know what we are doing wrong. Thanks for your help.

Frustrated and ready to quit.

03-14-2005, 05:18 PM	#1 (permalink)
playfulnreno Registered Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 3 Location: Somewhere USA	Frustrated and feel our looks are keeping us from finding playmates Without making this a book......LOL - we are fairly new to the swinging lifestyle about 1 year and have had some wonderful experiences and are REALLY wanting many more BUT we seem to have a small problem. We are a couple in our mid 40's - she is on the plump side, beautiful face (REALLY!) great personality and I'm well less than average, hefty side, balding and just not all that to look at BUT I have a great personality as well and really know what women like (HOW THE HELL DO YOU THINK I GOT HER! LOL). Anyway - we are having a very difficult time with hooking up with other couples because of our looks. The couples we find attractive are not interested because we are not the "beautiful" people, you know great bodies, beautiful faces, etc. and the ones who are interested are just not attractive to us. It has gotten to the point of becoming very frustrated. She feels it is her fault because she is on the plump side and this is really killing her self esteem not to mention it is hurting mine to. Usually people have a problem with the actual swinging LOL we are fine there - it is the frustration we have when nothing happens that is killing us. I am not looking for answers just words of encouragement, etc. We understand the physical attraction we have that as well - but we also believe in getting to know people as well before we say no. We have had several couples who have meet us at clubs end up going off with others we have introduced them to only to exclude us. Would just like to know what we are doing wrong. Thanks for your help. Frustrated and ready to quit.