[Vantabulous]

chloe,

You mention that your husband gets very upset and that makes you start feeling bad. Let me say that you shouldn't feel bad at all. In fact, you should have steam blowing out of your ears like a tea kettle at full boil. In fact, darned near everyone on this Board should, as well, in my opinion.

No one, on this Board, or anywhere else can make up your mind for you about what is, or isn't, moral. And, please, don't let anyone, including your husband try to convince you that it's an "issue", or "issues", that you have. (I'm beginning to dislike the word "issue" for it's negative connotation as much as I dislike hearing people use "disrespect" as a verb. "Concern" sounds friendlier to me.)

I don't consider swinging immoral, and my wife and I don't swing. I have a great deal of respect for the members of this Board and I know, from spending a lot of time reading the posts, what is meant when they refer to "enhancing their relationships". Your husband is being totally unfair to you when he grabs a phrase, out of context, and tries to pass it off like a sales pitch. It's cheap, and no one out here seriously concerned about their spouse or "significant other" would pull that kind of crap (there I go again) on someone they love.

The topic of "adultery" falls into the same category as far as I'm concerned, even if I will - reluctantly - agree with your husband on that point. That, however, is my point of view and shouldn't sway you one way or the other.

The "heart and soul" of this lifestyle is about you and your husband. There isn't one couple out here, truly committed to one another, that would put their relationship in jeopardy by swinging. It's a means, not an end.

Van