[JustAskJulie]

Here's Clitfriend's profile from Swappernet for those who may like to review it for him:

Name: TOM
Sex: MALE
Race: CELTIC
Sex Pref: STRAIGHT
Age: 40
Weight: 196 - 200 lbs
Height: 5 ft. 6 in - 5 ft. 8 in.
Hair: Black Hair
Eyes: Brown
Safe Sex: Upon request
Experience: Several Years
Enjoys: More the merrier
Meet others via: *
Looks: Somewhat attractive
Smokes: No
Type of Swinger: Swapper
Age looking for: Any age but
must be legal
Will travel to you: YES
ICQ Number: *
Will meet single males: YES
Will meet single females: YES
How far will he travel: 91 - 120 miles

How does he describe himself?
Ahh yes---describe myself--w/o making myself out to be God's gift to women--right?---Ok---I am not God's gift to women! Is That descriptive enough for you? OK, ok---so that wasn't really very descriptive! But honestly---how does one describe themself in these things w/o being vain---I mean in order to perfectly describe myself---I would have to lie and tell you I am perfect--(which I am for you, of course!) I think the best way to describe myself is for you to get to know me persoanally so that you can personally tell me what you think of me---That way I could come up with ways of describing myself, base on actual witness' reports! ---And if it turns out that you dont like me---well then I guess I will have to make something spectacular about myself up!--So meet me and like me----otherwise I will be force to be lying to people---instead of laying with women! Update---I opened up my letters thingie here to received letters from single males as well--However that is only because I am the founder of the swapper group SINGLES WANNA MINGLE TOO--This in no way, shape or form says I want to date the singles guys here, I can date myself to that!!! It just allows for the guys in my group to contact me directly if they need to, and for other guys to send me an email if they would like to inquire what the group is about---By the way--If u are a single guy, or a single female, or a couple that allows single guys into your sexlife, why don't you join as well?? We have over 170 members--and we will be growing strong~!---
What does he like sexually?
The fact that I as of yet do not need a prescription for Viagra! Sexually speaking--I like to be sexually active! I very seriously love the taste of women! I especially am always thrilled when I am able to make a woman crush my tongue with her orgasms! I am a very serious BBW admirer~! I honestly do not know why more guys are not. They really make some of the greatest lovers to be had! I love to be the reason for a lady's pleasures! It is an exciting joy for me to know--I have the ability to turn a lady on in so many ways! Please consider joining SINGLES WANNA MINGLE TOO---I am going to make this a nationwide group----we already have nearly 150 members from across this country--and I am aiming to make it over 10,000 members!!! Can I do it I wonder?????--
What does he dislike sexually?
The usual abnormal stuff that lots of people talk about on their profiles that requires for one to seriously think about the quality of other human beings that I have to be force to share this earth with. For example, I have a serious problem with someone who wants to pierce my aprendages, and then try to hang me from a ceiling that way!----(Special note here----I know that my profile contains lots of pictures of my cats, of which I have ten of---This in no way shape or form mean that I make love with animals. It just that I didnt have any personal lady friends I could take naked pictures of--so I decided to take pictures of all of my "pussy"cats! Perhaps one day however--I will be able to remove those pictures, and replace them with that of a beautiful lady who will bless my life!) Are u a single male or a single female who would like to mingle with like minded people??? Are you a couple, who would either occassionally---or frequently allow for friendship with a single male as well as a single female???? Join my group--SINGLES WANNA MINGLE TOO!!! It is already nearly 150 members strong and your membership will make it stronger!!!
Unfulfilled fantasy?
Simple----Every woman who looks at my pictures on this profile of mine--will find me so irresistable and sexy, and soo hard to resist---so that I will never have a night w/o a hot date by my side! (Or under me, or over me, or in front of me, or....) I have another fantasy, that every SINGLE one of you folks will become my new friends--and that fantasy can be fulfilled if you join the group SINGLE WANNA MINGLE TOO--today!!!
Would like to meet?
I would like to meet Abby, and Annie, and Angie, and Barbra, and Beatrice, and Bonnie, and Brittney, and Carolyn, and Christy, and Claire, and Denise, and Diana, and Donna, and Eileen, and Elise, and.......
Would not like to meet?
I would not like to meet Aarron, (unless of course he is Abby's mate), or Adam, (unless of course he is Annie's mate), or Alan, (unless of course he is Angie's mate), or Bobby, (unless of course he is Barbra's mate), or Bret, (unless of course he is Brittney's mate), or Carl, (unless of course he is Carlyn's mate), or Christopher, (unless of course he is Christy's mate), or Dennis, (unless of course he is Denise's mate), or Donald, (unless of course she is Donna's mate), or Earnest, (unless of course he is Eileen's mate), or Elvin, (unless of course he is Elise's mate), or......
I would not like to meet Aarron, (unless of course he is Abby's mate), or Adam, (unless of course he is Annie's mate), or Alan, (unless of course he is Angie's mate), or Bobby, (unless of course he is Barbra's mate), or Bret, (unless of course he is Brittney's mate), or Carl, (unless of course he is Carlyn's mate), or Christopher, (unless of course he is Christy's mate), or Dennis, (unless of course he is Denise's mate), or Donald, (unless of course she is Donna's mate), or Earnest, (unless of course he is Eileen's mate), or Elvin, (unless of course he is Elise's mate), or......
I would not like to meet Aarron, (unless of course he is Abby's mate), or Adam, (unless of course he is Annie's mate), or Alan, (unless of course he is Angie's mate), or Bobby, (unless of course he is Barbra's mate), or Bret, (unless of course he is Brittney's mate), or Carl, (unless of course he is Carlyn's mate), or Christopher, (unless of course he is Christy's mate), or Dennis, (unless of course he is Denise's mate), or Donald, (unless of course she is Donna's mate), or Earnest, (unless of course he is Eileen's mate), or Elvin, (unless of course he is Elise's mate), or......
Ideal meeting place?
Somewhere public first--like a unisex bathroom perhaps--(just kidding!) Oh--by the way--check out the Swappernet group I started--'SINGLES WANNA MINGLE TOO!'---That is a really good group to meet a lot of fun people who are already members of the group!
How would he tell you he is NOT interested?
"What?? You want me to keep going out with you??? Are you crazy??? You couldn't even suck a straw!!! I bet if Barney Fife had a choice of going out with you or Phyllis Dillar---he would ask for Phyllis' sister!"---or something not along those lines
What made him decide to try swinging?
Well--as a single male--I am actually finding it very difficult to really get into the swinging lifestyle inspite of all of the "Openminded" swingers there suppose to be out there. However--Mary Palm, and her sister Rosie---are begging for some extra help to keep up with the work---so I told them I will check into here and hope for the best!