[bear_n_bunny]

At the risk of being wildly redundant, no, neither of you should "take one for the team". Bunny and I have little signals we pass to each other in situations like that to let the other know if we are interested in a particular person.

Of course, we don't usually do the "hook up at the club" thing either. When we meet a couple, the first time is just a "get acquainted" thing, with the rule being no playing on the first date, so to speak. That way we have plenty of time to determine if either of us are interested in the other couple. For that matter, this also tells us if either or both members of the other couple are interested in us.

If there is interest all around, a second meeting is arranged, and play takes place. On the other hand, if there is an issue of any sort, we have time to deal with it and no one is put in any uncomfortable situations.

Another angle I've not see addressed here is, what happens if both of you are interested, but only one of them is interested in return, i.e., it's the other way around.

Bunny and I had this happen once at a club. We met up with several couples we knew, and they had brought along two new couples. Well, this one guy and Bunny really hit it off in a big way. But I took one look at his wife, and it was clear she had no interest in me at all. Which was too bad for Bunny and "John", as we also have a rule that says we both play or neither of us does. Sort of a reverse on not "taking one for the team".

It would be interesting to hear how you all deal with THAT situation.

-- Bear