The Swingers Board - View Single Post - If he won't stay within their boundaries what makes us think he will stay within ours

findtime · 01-11-2005, 03:03 AM

Boundaries are set for a reason and if one person has so little respect for the comfort level of their own spouse, what are the chances they'll have respect for yours?
I agree it's supposed to be fun, not work, but how much fun is it to watch your partner foray into areas previously off limits? My husband and I have two boundaries, no MF kissing (that is an intimacy we alone share) and same room only. It would end swinging for me then and there if I looked over and saw him in a lip lock with another woman and the trust level of the relationship would be damaged. We got into this lifestyle because we trust each other so completely. Also, how much fun are you going to have if you have to constantly remind this man about your boundaries during your time together? This woman can assure you all she wants, it's her husband that she claims doesn't stick to the rules. How will your husband react if he sees you having to fight off unwelcome advances, or succumbing to them, for that matter, in the heat of the moment? Is it worth it?
To hell with how the other couple feels if you cancel. Especially if you're smacked in the face with a great big red flag from the onset. Why risk it? Your marriage and your happiness comes first and there plenty of considerate couples out there.

How did things go?

01-11-2005, 03:03 AM	#12 (permalink)
findtime Here to Stay Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 73 Location: Canada Status: couple	Re: Cold Feet, or Alarms Boundaries are set for a reason and if one person has so little respect for the comfort level of their own spouse, what are the chances they'll have respect for yours? I agree it's supposed to be fun, not work, but how much fun is it to watch your partner foray into areas previously off limits? My husband and I have two boundaries, no MF kissing (that is an intimacy we alone share) and same room only. It would end swinging for me then and there if I looked over and saw him in a lip lock with another woman and the trust level of the relationship would be damaged. We got into this lifestyle because we trust each other so completely. Also, how much fun are you going to have if you have to constantly remind this man about your boundaries during your time together? This woman can assure you all she wants, it's her husband that she claims doesn't stick to the rules. How will your husband react if he sees you having to fight off unwelcome advances, or succumbing to them, for that matter, in the heat of the moment? Is it worth it? To hell with how the other couple feels if you cancel. Especially if you're smacked in the face with a great big red flag from the onset. Why risk it? Your marriage and your happiness comes first and there plenty of considerate couples out there. How did things go?