[northindycpl]

After our first 'experience' I had miixed feelings, too. I do not think Mr. Indy did, or atleast he didn't discuss them with me.

I am Catholic, and the negitivity and guilt I felt afterwards was tremendous! I felt like I was going to hell for sure, as I had no way to repent (I wasn't about to go to confession for this one!!!) I also felt like I was in someway Cheating, or breaking the rules.

It also wasn't what I expected it to be. I was disappointed. It was a MMF and I felt like I had to work so hard! I had fantasized that it would be all about me, and to a degree I was the center of attention, however, it wasn't exactly what I had hoped for.

I was also concerned that Mr. Indy would be jealous. I do not think that I ever let myself go, for fear of his jealousy. There were times during the evening that he was jealous, but I think I amplified it tremendously in my mind. All and all however, I wasn't prepared to get back into the saddle again for awhile.

It took me a lot of time to evaluate my feelings on the event. Talking to Mr. Indy about it, and reading others opinions of their first's help me too. I think everyone goes through unplanned emotions, often. The one thing I learned that helps everytime, is communication with my husband, continually.

I talk to him often, especially before a big night. We discuss everything we can think of, every scenerio, every action, etc...

A good friend recently said to me that you are only as comfortable as your least comfortable spouse. Mr. Indy is an expert on making me feel comfortable, and judging the situation. I am probably the least comfortable spouse in our marriage, so he constantly makes sure I am ok. I also know that if for whatever reason I am not ok. I tell him and it is over, no questions asked. I don't care if he is in mid stroke having the time of his life, he will get me and we will talk or leave. I do the same for him. We have very good rules and we stick with them. Always.

It works for us!