It is a huge mistake for anyone to marry thinking that the other person WILL change - or that they CAN change the person.
It is far more rational [and makes a stronger foundation] for a marriage or LTR if each love [and accept] one another as they are.
It would seem then, that the decision is yours to make - whether your involvement in the lifestyle is important enough you are unwilling to give it up. Certainly it would be very wrong if you planned to continue while keeping it apart and secret from her. That is cheating in anyone's eyes - in or out of the lifestyle.
Over time, once the lady has grown to trust that you place your relationship as your highest priority, it is
possible she
might consider the lifestyle differently. It would have to be a choice she felt comfortable and willing to make without any pressure from you. It could take months, more likely it would take years. You would need to leave the subject alone until she did get there and you would need to move just as cautiously and/or slowly as she wanted.
If you cannot accept that it may
never happen and be happy with the relationship the two of you have without the lifestyle, then I believe it would be a mistake [and wrong for both of you] to marry.
WR
