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Originally Posted by Mike and Jan And isn't that one of the main attractions to swinging? Igniting the couples passions? |
This is a really fascinating topic that I suspect a lot can relate to who surf through here, read around with hopeful expectations and then disappear.
First off, I want to say that I appreciate what Rich is saying - that you have these interests, but you live "vicariously" through the board. More married men in your situation who do post, do so to try to impress upon swingers to help them destroy their marriage. I don't get that from you - and it is as refreshing as it is admirable.
You are right - the surprising benefit of swinging has been the communication that we have with each other (we talk about sex and swinging constantly - filling "everyday" conversations with flirtatious or outright raunchy talk) and this - along with the memories of certain playtimes - fuels what was already a very active sex life. We have moved from five times a week to frankly losing count!
It seems to me that maybe your wife, Rich, is struggling not so much with remorse as with jealousy. Maybe she would enjoy living "vicariously" with you, but can't actually handle the act of swinging. She seemed to enjoy the stories and such, so maybe if you took here to that point again - and then just backed off, letting her enjoy it right there without feeling the pressure to move forward...
Spoomonkey