[Spoomonkey]

Okay...

I had an interesting discussion with a guy the other day... We had rebuffed him as a single male (for many reasons - language, inability to spell, overuse of the word "dawg", etc.) by telling him that we do not meet single men on the internet. This is true - it wasn't the only reason that we weren't interested, but it was reason enough.

Yesterday, he IMs me again. Only this time - he has a girlfriend. He's known her for five days, "but she is such a freak!" So, of course, we ought to all get together, now that he's a "couple."

Well - of course the answer was still no from the start... He still used the word "dawg" way too much...

But as our conversation evolved, I found out that:

1. She was already using the "L" word with him, but he wasn't ready to talk about his feelings with her...

2. He once beat up some guys at a swing event because he couldn't handle watching other men "hit that" - but this is a "perfect" set up because he doesn't like her enough to beat me up if I get my jiggy on...

3. He hadn't told her that he was going to now use her as some strange love offering to swinging couples... But he knew that she'd be into it because - as we've established - "she is such a freak!"

Okay...

So - I pointed out that he was not - according to any sane definition of the word - part of a couple. But he insisted that he was - and I just needed to give him a break...

For me, a couple is any two people that we consider to have a secure relationship. That is a VERY fuzzy definition. After all, that could mean a lot of things. Maybe they're married, maybe not. Maybe they've been together forever, maybe not. Maybe they are attached at the hip, maybe not... But what matters is whether or not we get a good vibe.

This approach has left us with a couple of experiences that we kind of wish we hadn't had... One lady in an unmarried couple began to act really, really weird about me - saying she'd chosen certain dresses and shaved just for me...

Another couple we were heading in a really positive direction with - feeling really good about them - when the female said to me, "his girlfriend would just die if she knew what he was doing."

*shrivel*

So my question for the panel is this...

How do you define a couple? When does 1+1 really equal 2?

And am I being a little hard on the use of the word "dawg"?

Spoomonkey