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Originally Posted by lovemonkey#1 hi guys,
recently my SO and i posted a profile on Swing Lifestyle and have gotten a fairly decent amount of responses. we're very flattered and we've been discussing possibilities. while we're not interested in all of the couples, there are several that have contacted us that we're intrigued by, as well as 10-15 more that we've searched out but have not contacted yet. we have yet to have our first experience and we've decided to take it slow. we'd prefer to start with same-room sex and, under the right circumstances, progress to a soft swap.
so, here's the first part of my question. speaking from experience, what's a good number of couples to court at the same time without getting overwhelmed? 1? 3? 5?
second part: once you get some swingtime logged in and you start to feel more comfortable with the lifestyle, how many couples do you tend to maintain relationships with and how often do you get together for playdates?
lastly, an etiquette question: if you're courting more than one couple at a time, is it considered rude to mention that you're seeing other couples or is that something that you just don't discuss?
now, i realize that a lot of people are going to respond with "it all depends on your comfort level..." for the first two questions, but i'm mainly looking for first hand experiences from people who have been through this. in other words, i'd like to hear about why you choose the numbers you do. i'm trying to get a feel for how most people go about this.
thanks for reading and i look forward to your responses  |
Actually, since you haven't had your first experience yet, we'd suggest that instead of trying to court 2 or 3 couples at once, pick the ONE that seems most "right" for you and experiment with them first (i.e. find out if the lifestyle "works" for you). This way, if you find it's not something you want to continue to pursue you don't have multiple couples that you then have to go back to and say "sorry, we changed our minds."
Don't be in a rush to have that first experience either. First impressions are important - for us, our first experience (which was excellent, BTW) set the tone for continued experimentation - and we've had an absolute blast ever since!
As for the second part of the question, we maintain friendly relationships with some 20 couples, and know many other by extension. We get together with a given couple once a month, but for the most part we usually catch up with everyone at parties and such.
Have fun!