I don't disagree with other posters in terms of finding others that he might be attracted to, but my take on your predicament is that it is you that feels out of place - or fat. Most often, we are our own worst enemies in that regard.
A thirty pound weight gain is something to concern yourself with but it isn't a huge amount either. It is quite common for people to gain weight when they have orthopedic problems. In part, this stems from lack of activity, but also, some of the medications can cause a greatly increased appetite (Medrol Dose Pac - steroid) as well as fluid retention. Also, I would imagine you have taken truckloads of anti-inflammatory drugs and it is recommended that you eat with that type of medication to avoid stomach problems. combine that with inability to be active, and....
So...as a first step, I would recommend consultation with your orthopod. If you are currently on meds, he might be able to change some of the prescriptions. If not, and especially if the weight gain is the result of steroids, it might be a rough road to weight loss, but it can be done. Drink lots and lots of water. In addition to filling you up, it also helps flush things from your system, hydrates your cells so that they can perform at their optimum, thereby increasing your metabolism. Also...eat. You may want to limit the quantity and type of foods you are eating, but try to eat even a couple of crackers and peanut butter, boiled eggs...something...every 3-4 hours. (That's my latest thing!) Seriously, tho', eating small amounts of appropriate foods frequently really does increase your metabolism and ultimately helps you lose weight. Also, it prevents you (me) from getting really hungry and pigging out on every potato chip and Hershey bar in town.
Now...while you are doing this stuff, do exactly what Naughty said. Stop referring to yourself as fat. "Fat" may be just your perception. Why not join him in the gym. You can do upper body work-outs to increase muscle tone and that will also dramatically increase your metabolism to aid in weight loss. And you know, personally, I've found that if I am actively involved in doing something, even when I've put on a few pounds, I feel one heck of a lot better about myself. And that feeling comes across in my attitude.
My sympathy...ankle surgeries are rough. - EBF
