[stoutgatte]

Just saw the date on the last post from mr twoloves, guess my story will have to serve as a warning for others on here...

Hi... We're very new to swinging, but my wife had an affair about a year ago. It started out in the same way, solo play (she asked if it was ok and I said yes), a lot of attention from the guy, etc, etc...

I eventually did just what he did, say I'm not happy, u have to stop... She said, "I'm not stopping and that's that." The whole time claiming it's just fun and sex and definitely nothing more... So this went on a while and the more I tried to get her out of this guy the hotter she was for him. Eventually it came to the point where we decided to get divorced. Two days later she was in a car accident that forced me to take care of her for 6 weeks. During this time we slowly grew back together, to the point where we started councelling and sorted out the issues...

My advice would have been... Move out. Get her to realise the issue at hand, she's NOT just having fun and a bit of sex with this guy, it's a relationship and one that she's willing to hold onto regardless of your marraige. But at the same time, check what the relationship with this guy is giving her, and replace it with attention in those areas from yourself... Conflicting advice? Definitely...

It is possible to work through it, difficult, and expect to be way more unhappy before getting happy again... Sad mr twoloves won't see this...