Friends with frills are the ideal. But - they are hard to find. We look for that constantly, but it can be frustrating - and since we like the play aspect, we supplement or hopeful search with the clubs.
But clubs definitely aren't for everyone and some of the folks around here who have posted about their experiences (even though they do not "club") and they are really, really hot. chance encounters and spontaneous backyard orgies certainly rule.
But, we've seen your situation more than once. "Half a couple" looking to swing - pretending to be a couple and then thinking that we'll just play with the "him" part... Poo-poo heads...
Spoomonkey