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Odd 'rejection' on SLS

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Ok, I'm sure this has been posted about before.

 

About a week ago, a couple on SLS sent us a message, we checked the profile and responded. They respond that they would like to have drinks sometime. Great. I reply and tell them drinks would be great, but that the next few Saturdays are booked b/c of holiday parties (company functions).

 

I get a reply that they do not think we are compatible and good luck.

 

Eh, I was just left a little confused by that one since we were not the ones to initiate contact and I thought I was doing the right thing by letting them know up front that our next few Saturdays are spoken for (however, our Fridays are not). I mean, are we not compatible b/c we don't want to drop our previously made plans to meet for a drink?

 

Anyone else have something like this happen?

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Similar one time. We just shrugged and went on.

 

You held up your end of the bargain and were polite enough to be upfront about your schedule, so don't worry about it. Maybe they were looking/hoping for a quick hookup, and when that wasn't going to happen, just moved on to the next.

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Off the top of my head I would say. That maybe one person out of the couple sent the eamil without asking the other. What can I say you are one sexy woman.. :kissface: We are like you, we tell people up front and if they can not handle it. Then see ya, your loss, thank you come again... :)

 

 

JAY!!!

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Well I thought it was general courteousness to be upfront rather than have them saying...'ok how about next weekend?' nope, no good...'ok how about the one after that?' nope, try again....lol

 

I was basically left shrugging thinking...'oooook'. :confused:

 

I figured it had happened to others, just thought I'd put it out there.

 

And I'm with ya Jay...that might be a better way to look at it...:lol: They would have had a great time....rotflmao :D

 

Maria :kissface:

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Yep, have had that as well as several other similar things happen dozens of times and I am sure that it will happen many more times to come. Welcome to the lifesyle and all the weird and wacky things that come with it. We have had many odd rejections and have had many folks that seemed like good potential prospects just vanish into thin air like a fart in the wind.

 

But the good news is we have had some pan out and have had some great times as well. Just keep plugging along and don't let the oddballs get you down.

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We've had this happen a couple of times on SLS over the last four years. We figured the couple wanted something "sure" for that coming weekend, and when we replied by telling them we weren't free THEN, but we were free another time, it queered the deal for them. {shruggs}. Don't let it get you down.

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Ok, I'm sure this has been posted about before.

 

About a week ago, a couple on SLS sent us a message, we checked the profile and responded. They respond that they would like to have drinks sometime. Great. I reply and tell them drinks would be great, but that the next few Saturdays are booked b/c of holiday parties (company functions).

 

I get a reply that they do not think we are compatible and good luck.

 

Eh, I was just left a little confused by that one since we were not the ones to initiate contact and I thought I was doing the right thing by letting them know up front that our next few Saturdays are spoken for (however, our Fridays are not). I mean, are we not compatible b/c we don't want to drop our previously made plans to meet for a drink?

 

Anyone else have something like this happen?

 

TIA,

 

Maria :kissface:

 

I agree with Jay in that very possibly the one spouse was talking for both and then the other one was not interested; but I've seen your pics and I think they are crazy if that happened lol.....my first thought was that they were bed notchers. We get emails kind of often from couples that really expect for us to throw the kids in the closet and tear out of the house in 10 minutes to boink in a hotel room. lol. They may have expected play when THEY wanted play; and when you said hey, we have this thing called a life they said forget y'all. Either way its their loss, don't worry about it.

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We had this happen once. The funny thing is, it was with a couple that contacted us and we never would have initiated contact with them. But, their PM was nice and they were "on the fence" for us - if we met them and they had a great personality, who knows.

 

We shared a couple of PMs and decided to meet for drinks.

 

But right before we were to meet, they contacted us by phone with a rejection that started with "hate to rain on your parade, but..."

 

:lol:

 

That was just one of those weird things where it actually worked out well with our schedules since we were trying to make time to meet them without really having it - and we were really worried that we'd ultimately end up in a situation where we would have to turn them down after meeting face to face.

 

We actually laughed about it - in fact, I think I kind of laughed on the phone at the time. We weren't exactly planning a parade - and if we had anything planned it was an exit route in case things didn't work out.

 

I don't know why they went from "let's meet" to "no thanks" - in your situation or in ours. But it could be anything. Maybe you misspelled a word in your PM and they are OCD about that sort of thing. Who knows. But that's what fate is for. The people you should get to know and build a friendship with tend to stay "in your face" until you just have to go over and say "hello". Those you shouldn't, things just don't work out for some reason; some odd reason...

 

Chances are you were just saved a big headache.

 

:)

 

Spoomonkey

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About a week ago, a couple on SLS sent us a message, we checked the profile and responded. They respond that they would like to have drinks sometime. Great. I reply and tell them drinks would be great, but that the next few Saturdays are booked b/c of holiday parties (company functions).

 

I get a reply that they do not think we are compatible and good luck.

 

Hi Maria, I'm just curious...in your email to them, after you said "the next few Saturdays are booked" did you add, "but Friday is good for us"?

 

If they didn't get an alternative opening within that email, they may have assumed you were saying "no", or reading into it, "we are so busy that we won't meet you for at least a couple of months". People tend to read a lot into initial communications.

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We have an ad on SLS but haven't hooked up with anyone there. We found a mfm partner on aff more than 5 years ago. Right now my wife has four male friends and she's pretty content with her sex partners.

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Anyone else have something like this happen?

 

TIA,

 

Maria

Joann and I have had a profile at SLS for three years. Many times something like this has happened. At SLS or any of the other make-contact-with-swingers Web sites, there will be wierdness. You just have to say to yourselves, "It's not us." Don't let this deter you. If you persist, you will meet nice people.

 

Michael

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Hi Maria, I'm just curious...in your email to them, after you said "the next few Saturdays are booked" did you add, "but Friday is good for us"?

 

If they didn't get an alternative opening within that email, they may have assumed you were saying "no", or reading into it, "we are so busy that we won't meet you for at least a couple of months". People tend to read a lot into initial communications.

 

Hi Tybee...I did tell them the next few Saturdays are booked, but the rest of our schedule is open.

 

While I wasn't trying to overanalyze the response I got from them, I figured they might have taken it as a 'nice rejection' themselves. I know that many people are primarily looking to meet up on Saturday nights...so that was why I let them know our schedule up front.

 

But like Spoo said...we may have been saved a potential headache and just didn't know it yet. lol

 

Maria :kissface:

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Thanks everyone for your responses! I figured that we weren't the only one this had happened to...we got a good chuckle out of it and are just kind of taking it in stride.

 

 

Maria :kissface:

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Yeah, they may have been oversensitive types (took your answer the wrong way), or the kind that want you to drop everything and go get a room on their schedule. Either way, you probably are better off without them. ;)

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Hi Tybee...I did tell them the next few Saturdays are booked, but the rest of our schedule is open.

 

While I wasn't trying to overanalyze the response I got from them, I figured they might have taken it as a 'nice rejection' themselves. I know that many people are primarily looking to meet up on Saturday nights...so that was why I let them know our schedule up front.

 

But like Spoo said...we may have been saved a potential headache and just didn't know it yet. lol

 

Maria :kissface:

 

Yeah, one thing you can't do on sls is take things personally.

However, our schedule is open on Friday....

LOL, jk!

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Yeah, one thing you can't do on sls is take things personally.

However, our schedule is open on Friday....

LOL, jk!

 

We'll see you then! lmao :)

 

Make sure the kids have food and water bowls...jk (I still get a laugh over people that think you can just lock the kids away for a few hours :) )

 

 

Maria :kissface:

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We'll see you then! lmao :)

 

Make sure the kids have food and water bowls...jk (I still get a laugh over people that think you can just lock the kids away for a few hours :) )

 

 

Maria :kissface:

 

You'd be shocked. We have one couple, he actually got MAD because we could not drop the kids like that and go meet him and his s/o. He said "you always have the children"...sorry, we kind of birthed them. LOL. Sorry for being horny monkeys in our 20s, we didn't figure out until the birth of our 3rd that that magical stuff coming out of Jay's hoo hoo was actually creating these screaming poop machines. Our bad.

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Ok, I'm sure this has been posted about before.

 

About a week ago, a couple on SLS sent us a message, we checked the profile and responded. They respond that they would like to have drinks sometime. Great. I reply and tell them drinks would be great, but that the next few Saturdays are booked b/c of holiday parties (company functions).

 

I get a reply that they do not think we are compatible and good luck.

 

Eh, I was just left a little confused by that one since we were not the ones to initiate contact and I thought I was doing the right thing by letting them know up front that our next few Saturdays are spoken for (however, our Fridays are not). I mean, are we not compatible b/c we don't want to drop our previously made plans to meet for a drink?

 

Anyone else have something like this happen?

 

TIA,

 

Maria :kissface:

 

Do you have pics of both of you on your profile? This happened to us once messaging with another couple. When they opened their private pics (the only ones that showed anything with the guy), he was so not my type physically that there was no personality to get past it. Not sure if that's the problem, but why we have a pic of us both in our public pics and give plenty of details.

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He said "you always have the children"...sorry, we kind of birthed them. LOL. Sorry for being horny monkeys in our 20s, we didn't figure out until the birth of our 3rd that that magical stuff coming out of Jay's hoo hoo was actually creating these screaming poop machines. Our bad.

 

Yeah...when I got pregnant with my son...my daughter was about 8 months old...the nurse asked, 'you do know how that happens don't you?' my response was 'we have a working hypothesis and we almost have it figured out' :lol:

 

Do you have pics of both of you on your profile? This happened to us once messaging with another couple. When they opened their private pics (the only ones that showed anything with the guy), he was so not my type physically that there was no personality to get past it. Not sure if that's the problem, but why we have a pic of us both in our public pics and give plenty of details.

 

Yes, our default picture is of both of us and there are available face pics of the both of us that are not private.

 

Maria :kissface:

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I agree with lostj1. Or maybe something was written that they did not like while you guys were chatting, if you guys made it that far. We wrote to this couple one time and eveything was going great. We met, had dinner and drinks and even planned another meet up. By the third chat, I realized that we were no longer compatable. She said that she was bi, but her and hubby hab been with str8 couples before. The turn off was when she wrote that she had converted a number of str8 women and that she would bet on her life that if I tried it, she could convert me too. She kept on talking about it even after I told her that I was not intereted in bi play. So we had to stop chatting with them. We even went as far as blocking them because they wanted to know why we stopped chatting with them.

 

Hope that this was not the case with you guys, but who knows. Life goes on. Just take it as a lesson learned.;)

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Yes, our default picture is of both of us and there are available face pics of the both of us that are not private.

 

Maria :kissface:

 

That's just weird then. I can't figure people out either sometimes. Sorry that happened to you guys.

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The truth is, sometimes you can figure out the reason, other times the truth is something you absolutely cannot predict or expect. The thing is not to drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out because you're probably wrong, anyway. Move on to a couple who are really into you,

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All we can say is "Welcome to the wonderful world of Internet swinging!". Most likely, they have a "pre-arranged" rejection notice that when you didn't jump to their beat they initiated. No biggie. If you're in any type of relatively populated area you should be able to find much better partners on SLS in a very short time that will fit with YOUR schedule.

 

Best of luck!

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We ahd a somewhat similar situation. A couple contacted us, we checked out their profile and agreed to meet with them, set a date about a week out. We wrote to ask where and what time we should meet and the day before we were supposed to meet up, we still hadn't heard back from them and we had a few other promising offers so we wrote them and said something had come up, we would still like to meet but could we make it next weekend. They said no problem, we set the date for saturday again, and again we wrote to work out the details. This time, noy only did they not respond, they didn't sign on for about 7 days I was actually starting to woryy that something might have happened when I noticed a couple days after we were supposed to meet up, that they were online. I thought they might write letting us know what happened but we still haven't heard from them.

 

Oh well, we've got plenty of prospects. :)

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Couples that can only meet on short notice or who get upset becasue you can't meet at their whim are a BIG red flag for us.

 

Maybe this "couple" was upset about not meeting because that was the only night he could get away from his wife and she could get away from her husband?

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We all put our best pics up for public viewing. We are careful to put things in our profile hoping to attract the type of people we are looking for. We contact people based on what we see in the profile. Then comes the interview. Maybe a couple of chats, more pics, on the spot conversations. This is how you weed the good from the incompatible. It could just be that they were telling the truth that you are not compatible with them, nothing more. I am certainly not saying you did anything wrong or you messed up the interview. But contacting somebody isn't an automatic date regardless of who initiated it.

In fact I think they may have done the right thing. Wouldn't you rather find out now or be told before you meet them?

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In fact I think they may have done the right thing. Wouldn't you rather find out or be told before you meet them?

 

I agree to some extent, but the 'we're not compatible' came only after I made them aware that our next few Saturdays were not available. Other than that, the previous exchanges were pretty generic (ie: like your profile, want to get together for drinks sometime? reply: we like yours too, drinks would be nice).

 

We're not down about it, was just curious about others viewpoints is all. :)

 

Thanks for the responses!

 

Maria :kissface:

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