nitro2u2 17 Posted December 21, 2015 Let's say your current partner or new partner in the future doesn't like the idea of swinging, do you think you'd be able to give up on the idea and not think about it too? I feel like the idea is a major factor for me to get turned on and hard right now. If I have to completely give up thinking about it (even secretly in my own head during sex) I'm not sure how easy it would be to get excited by only 'normal sex'. But before I even knew about the lifestyle few years ago it was all fine. Strange. What are some of your thoughts? Quote Share this post Link to post
SW_PA_Couple 4,019 Posted December 21, 2015 Swing is not an addiction. People learn to accommodate to a circumstance. Quote Share this post Link to post
angelkin 1,326 Posted December 21, 2015 I'd give it up in a hot minute if my partner didn't want to continue to explore the lifestyle. This is just an adventure for us, we'd just find another hobby. Quote Share this post Link to post
cplnuswing 4,711 Posted December 21, 2015 I could give it up. I don't think about swinging sex when we are having sex now, so that wouldn't be an issue. There would be some aspects I would miss, but the actual sex is low on that list. I'd be feeling the loss of the people and sharing and participating in their outlook on life before I would be missing the sex. I think if anything, swinging or something else, is being used as a crutch to get through sex, then there are probably some problems there that need worked on. Not that anybody who has every had a fantasy during sex has problems, but if it is a must have each and every time thing, then that sexual relationship probably needs some attention from both parties involved. That's not meant to be as negative as it may sound. Good relationships take work to maintain and grow, and good sexual relationships take the same, and it's very easy for one or the other to get distracted with all the worries and concerns of real life and let that start to slip. I think nearly everyone has been there at one time or another. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post
intuition897 2,177 Posted December 22, 2015 We've been technically monogamous for over a decade now (I know, crazy right?). I think I'd be a little pissed off if Mr. intuition decided flat out that he no longer wanted to even discuss it. It would be like saying, "Let's not be honest with each other anymore." Could I do without the sex? Sure. Been doing without other-sex, like I said, for a decade now. But what I can't do without? The honesty in our relationship. I see that openness between us as part of who we are as individuals, and as a couple. There is simply no going back to vanilla-hood for me. You can't unknow what you know. You can't unring a bell. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post
funcoupledayton 2,707 Posted December 22, 2015 No, I couldn't not think about it. I would never be with a partner who tried to police my mind, though. I've had many amazing experiences swinging. I could probably behave in a monogamous manner, but I could never forget or want to forget our fun. Besides, I thought about other people in a sexual way before knowing anything about swinging. That is natural. Expecting a monogamous mind from a partner is unreasonable. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
kikonkrome 843 Posted December 23, 2015 I guess I tried full on monogamy a few times and it didn't work out. It's a bit of pandora's box, once opened you can't get it closed. I think it will stay with me for the rest of my life. That said I can easily seeing a few years off here and there. Different things happen in life and you have to choose your priorities. If either of us or our children became really ill for example, I could see not really being excited about swinging for a long time. Quote Share this post Link to post